Not In The Past

Looking forward from 30

Overthinking and fear

I’m a chronic overthinker, which is why sometimes I don’t get around to writing as much as I want to.  I have times when I have these very clear, direct messages I want to get out urgently, and then I come up with all these rationalizations for not going ahead and doing it.  Sometimes the words that pop into my head don’t turn out to be the ones that really nail what I’m feeling, and the correct ones just won’t materialize.  Sometimes I do something in the heat of passion, and then wonder what the consequences are going to be after the fact: sometimes I let this stop me from doing other things.

I know fear is the basis.  Sometimes, it can be justifiable, but once you let fear govern every decision you make, you become hollow, with no defense mechanism to guard against even the tiniest of disappointments.  One hit, you’re shattered.

Every so often, I retreat from engaging with friends and acquaintances.  I wonder if this has anything to do with it.  I express myself strongest through writing.  When I stop writing, I’m withdrawing from the world.

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3 thoughts on “Overthinking and fear

  1. Sometimes it’s good to have an escape from the world. As long as you come back every now & then.

  2. Being afraid of what other people will think is not the way to go as you are who you are and you are perfect the way you are.

    However, I can relate when you talk about thinking and thinking but not being able to either put it down or even get proper words out. Sometimes you think you have an amazing thought but by the time you get it down it gets lost in complicated words and every next sentence tries to explain the previous and there you go down the rabbit hole.

  3. A great entry this, as so many people are likely to identify with it. I know I can definitely over think a lot and that my own fear of the judgements people might make on my writing can keep me from sharing what I’ve written. Fear is an incredible powerful emotion – but not the enemy. Fear is a call to action, to plan, to prepare for something. For me I think fear is telling me to prepare for criticism and to learn to let go of my ego with regards to what I write.

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